( I listed my techniques on my first blog entry)
So it has been 6 weeks, and so far I have lost 12 pounds.... about 3 of those pounds were gained and lost again every since the 4th of July weekend... lol
I always seem to eat more when I am with my family...
I did another mostly raw food day today. It's is actually pretty easy to do with the new consciousness techniques that I am using. I really do not get hungry much at all anymore.
It's not so much about hunger for me right now... it is more about the cravings and the extra time... yet the cravings also disappear using the same technique that I was using for hunger, so it is really pretty easy.
12 pounds in 6 weeks does not seem like much to me, it could be because of the fact that I was used to loosing a lot of weight fairly fast in the past from fasting, and extreme dieting. Usually, by now I have lost at least 20 to 30 pounds, and am just about to quit, and gain it all back...
Not this time!
This time I know it is different, because I am going to the source of the problem, and not just attempting to heal the symptoms....
I have officially broken the" Hunger-> Desire -> Satiate -> Guilt" pattern that has been with me on every attempt that I have done, and it feels good to be free from that highly destructive pattern.
So what am I left with... I still have 101 pounds to go to reaching my goal. So I search blogs daily, trying to find inspiration... and I am never let down. It is everywhere. In every blog that I follow.
What I am left with is my over obsessive mind. I am sure that is what is keeping me up. I have tried so many ways to let go of this extra weight, that I know many tricks, and tips. I guess I will just do a little of it all, when I feel inspired to do it.
I simply can not plan, cause I break rules. I can not use resistance, because there is always a balance to every thing I do. So if I resist today, than I do not resist on another day.
Today I woke up inspired to eat raw veggies again, so I did it. I did have half a roll with butter on it because my son could not finish it, and brought it to me. I chose not to resist, because I know there is a down side to resisting. I ate it, it was good, and I do not feel guilty. I also ended up way below my calorie intake for the day.
I am currently moved to doing a salt water flush because I feel that my body can benefit from a rest from food for a day or so, just to flush out the intestines. So that is what I will be doing for tomorrow. It is amazing how hard our bodies have to work just to digest food.
Since starting these techniques it seems like I have a lot more time on my hands. It is like there is this empty space, or a kind of void since I no longer spend most my waking hours preparing meals, and cleaning up after meals. It has given me a lot of time to think of all the things that I can do to help me move forward and reach my goal. Sometimes I wish I could take a nap, but I just have too much energy. I have been walking more lately, but I do not insist it upon myself.
I still have a lot of weight to let go of and perhaps that is why my mind is so obsessed. It remembers similar paths in the past where I ended up loosing stem and giving up. Of course, there was always some excuse that I would try to tell myself. The mind has it's ways, and must be watched. My problem was never with the body, it was always the mind and consciousness that got me to where I am at.
About 2 and a half years ago in early 2009 I was so sick, that I can remember going upstairs to my bedroom. The walk up stairs wiped me out, and I would sleep for 6 hours or so just recovering from exhaustion. At the time I was dealing with heavy menstrual cycles and would bleed for up to 35 days in a row. So naturally I was anemic. In fact I even had to go to the hospital for a blood transfusion.
My cycles continued to be severe for the first 6 months of that year. I could barely muster up enough energy to care for myself, not to mention my kids. It was pretty scary.
Looking back at that time now, I realize that I made myself sick, and my mind was there to help me stay that way. It got to the point that I had no choice but to do something. So I fasted on "water only" for 10 days, and restricted my diet for a couple months. I would have to say that even though I gained all the weight back, and then some, it was still a good thing that I did something. It changed the way I was thinking.
Today, though I weigh more than I did then, I can almost run up and down the stairs. I still get winded, but at least I am not going down the stairs like a 90 year old lady that can barely see anymore.
There are many other ailments that have since disappeared. I cut bread out of my diet for the most part. I might have bread of some sort 5 or 6 times a month, and that has certainly helped my digestion. So I guess, even when I gave up on loosing weight, I was still doing things to better my health, and I sure did learn a lot. I also cut down a lot on processed foods.
The greatest lesson that I learned from all my attempts to let go of weight was that my body is an obedient servant to my mind.
I also learned that my mind can be programmed to get my body in shape.
One thing I do my best not to say to myself now is " I can't" .....
Because I know I can... and I know that anyone can...
I know I do not have many readers right now, so thank you to anyone reading this blog.
I wish you the best that health and love can bring to you!!!
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